Hang out with good people and you will become a better person.Second, don’t differentiate between “dating” and hanging out, at least not in the early and middle stages of a relationship that may be leading to marriage.

russian orthodox view on dating-43

For most of history and in a large but shrinking portion of the Orthodox world today, single people did not have to worry about who they would marry: someone else chose for them. We cannot imagine not choosing our own hair style, clothing and career path; much less not choosing our own spouse.

In the best cases, the people involved had veto power; that is, neither one had to accept the match. We vainly imagine this power of choice is the same as freedom, but if we have no basis on which to choose other than our subjective urges, transient likes and dislikes, and fantasies based on movies, novels and occasional glimpses at internet pornography, then choice is not freedom but bondage: bondage to the ideals of a sick culture and the passions of a fallen mind.

But this is the reality many Orthodox Christians in North America and Europe today.

Some lucky few have relationships with parents or spiritual mentors that are close enough and mature enough to provide some guidance and advice in the search for a mate. Even if they do ask for advice or guidance from a priest or parent or other responsible person, many young people are merely seeking confirmation for what they already feel or think or lust for.

So this is where we start: one priest's dating guide for Orthodox Christians.

First, and this applies not only to dating, but to all friendships: Hang out with people you want to become like.

This does not mean that you do not hang out with people who are not perfect; that’s ridiculous, no one is perfect.

What it means is that you look for Christ-like virtues: kindness, gentleness, self control, faith, joy, etc.

People with these qualities or who are seeking these qualities will help you develop these qualities.