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If you really don’t have one, go hang out in West Hollywood or wherever the cool kids hang out in your town and make friends. If you’ve never seen a gay guy be protective, you are missing out.
Because he will protect you like no other knight in the world will. Your girlfriends can come with you on your dates or wait in the car, but unless you have a martial arts expert as a gal-pal, or the girl who insisted on playing in the male football league in high school, they are not going to have the same affect as an angry gay guy.
Best of all, the weirdo figured out quickly that he wasn’t going to try anything funky with me – so the date ended fast and I took home lots of great leftovers!
He didn’t dare because he knew my gay best friend was outside with an axe!
As predicted, the weirdo didn’t try anything weird with me.
Mine actually pulled an axe out and held it over his head as he warned my date that he was watching everything he did. We both thought the date was a little weird so we had to come up with something even weirder to keep they guy in check.
He will be honest with you if you have something green in your teeth and if your hair looks too puffy or too flat.
He will get a kick out of the fact that you are Dating 4 Food, but he will probably give you hell for Rule Number 8 – which requires that you go out with anyone who asks (minus weirdoes, freaks and creeps).
He will tell you not to lower your standards, for example, when he sees that you’re meeting a guy nicknamed “Mr. This is when you remind him that you are dating for food. Chubb” the minute he sees you making one of the Recipes for Leftovers.
Team up with your girlfriends who are Dating for Food and share leftovers.
There are many bonuses to having a gay best friend, besides being protected.
He will help you with things like picking out the right outfit and, and making sure your hair and make-up looks spectacular.
He will make sure you don’t look too slutty or too much like a teenager, (which are often the same thing).